the ATTACK of the CRAZY NEIGHBOR... or something like that

today ranks up there in the top of my worst days ever.

ugh!

i'm a wreck after this morning's incident.

i guess it's my own fault... because as i was going to sleep last night i thought to myself..."what's number three?"

bad things always come in three's...

yesterday zachary stuffed a tiny ball up his nose. i called our doctor (who pulled a rock from zach's nose about a year ago) but it was after 5pm and the nurse said to go to the emergency room......

in a last stitch effort to avoid that nightmare... i plugged the opposite nostril and told him to blow. on the third try the little yellow ball went flying across the room.

... THEN... after dinner and a bath we were brushing our teeth. i left zach to go floss and upon my return he had emptied the toothpaste onto the counter and proceeded to eat it.

why is my four and a half year old acting like he's going through the terrible twos again???

anywho... i called poison control and after assessing that he would had to have eaten over a half a tube to be toxic, she gave me some instructions... which required me to stay up for a few more hours and monitor him. he's fine.

as it happens... number three hit this morning. and boy was it a doozie.

my sister dropped off my niece for the morning, the kids were playing and i was working in my office when the doorbell rang profusely.

i hurry to see who it is... and it's the crazy neighbor.

i open the door... hesitantly... and she begins bellowing at me that her dogs have been attacked and she thinks it was my dogs. she demands that i come over to her house immediately.

of course i can't with the kids here so i tell her "let me go to the back" and i hurry to our backdoor... only to find my two sweet dogs half asleep on my patio. ???

i go outside and over to the fence and see her two lhasa apso's jumping at her feet... looking pretty beat up. one's eye is bloody and the other has blood on his little neck. so sad. she said his eye is coming out of it's head... but it's a lhasa apso. don't they do that anyway?

my neighbor begins yelling at me and telling me that my dogs come into her back yard "all the time" through a hole in her fence.

i notice small dog poop in my yard where i'm standing and say "looks like yours come over here too"

"yes" she replies... "they go back and forth all the time" ... and then begins to yell at me about that.

it's her darn fence.

but nonetheless... i humor her then ask "why haven't you told me about this?"

this is the woman to comes banging on my door when any dog in the neighborhood barks. my dogs were fast asleep in my bedroom one afternoon and she came over accusing them of barking and disturbing her nap. there are dogs at EVERY house on my block.... next door... behind us... they're everywhere. my dog's reside in the house most of the day... and sleep locked in every night. yet still she insists they bark at night. i've tried explaining that it's impossible... but no... to her, it's them.

what can i do? the woman is impossible.

she yells at me for even questioning why she hasn't told me about the hole before and then demands that i come with her to the vet. "you're taking responsibility for this" she yells at me.

i try to rationalize with her to no avail. she's just an irrational screaming mess.

she threatens me.... cusses at me ... and freaks out zach and grace... so i tell her i'll have to talk to her about it when she calms down. and we go back inside.

then... animal control shows up at my door. almost instantly. they were in the area because a pit bull has been on the loose and attacked a beagle up the road.

so i give my side of the incident to the officer... let her know that my dogs seemed to be asleep when the attack occurred. i told her she should look in to the possibility of it being that pit bull that attacked my neighbors dogs... and she leaves shortly after.

so then my neighbor comes banging on the door again... "what are you going to do about this"

"my sister will be here this afternoon, i'll come talk to you about it then"

then she rants off... ending with "if your dog attacks my son in a wheelchair i'll own you!"

i'll own you???

she has a 22 year old son with cerebral palsy who sits in the front yard a lot in his wheelchair. zach calls him "my friend"

she comes BACK over a few minutes later and begins her threats and demands again... so i ask her to leave, "you're upsetting my child" .. i say "i'll have to come talk to you this afternoon"

to which she replies "B-TCH" "you f-ing b-tch"

i mean... who does that? what kind of person acts that way? it's not like i did anything to her... IF anything... my dog messed up. but that is SO highly unlikely i'm not even willing yet to look at that as a possibility.

so i slammed the door in her face.

took some deep breaths.

then called the police. yep... i did.

the deputy i spoke to was really nice, and he said based on her actions i should file a trespassing order to keep her away from us.

i didn't do that... but i told him that if she comes back over here i will.

then, a few hours later, the sheriff of the county calls me. evidently the crazy lady is after me and i think he took pitty on me ... said he would drop everything if maddie, my sweet mellow little lab mix, is removed from his county.

well... what he actually said was that as long as i live next to the wacktard, maddie can't be in the county... but if i move then there would be no issue.

so basically... they don't think my dog is dangerous... but because craziness won't let it go.... she's forced his hand and me and my dog have to take the fall.

so... my sweet dog has to go. it's not right... it's just not right.

she's going back to live with my ex-husband, permanently.... which will be fine.

z's a little sad... but such is life i guess.

i'm mostly upset about being attacked by miss crazy pants.... and that this is my neighbor. she actually said to me "i've had nothing but problems with you since you've moved in"

me!?! i don't have parties, i don't even own a stereo, and i'm in bed by 10:00 every night. i hardly ever see her... and when i do i try to avoid her. i just don't get it.

so... it's been one big fat bummer of a day.